Just from one newspaper this morning the following inspiration:
Elliot Spitzer, the former Governor of NY who resigned in disgrace after a series of adulterous affairs with prostitutes was divulged, has decided he is now worthy of reconsideration and will re-enter politics. As long as he stays in the Empire state, that's okay with me.
Tiger Woods, who makes Elliot look like Bing Crosby in The Bells of St. Mary's , has rejoined the pro golf circuit and is playing in the masters. He was magnanimous enough to give a press conference to explain how he had seen the error of his ways and was now happy to get back to pleasing his fans, not to mention earning more money to please his wife and 6000 gal pals.
And then there's Tiki Barber who recently left his pregnant with twins wife and their two sons for a twenty something news intern. Seems he and the blond home wrecker had been an item (furtive, of course) since the bimbo babysat for Tiki's sons.
Let's not forget Lil Wayne, the Lollipop Rapper who is serving time for gun possession. Seems he has drawn the admiration of fellow inmates. As one cell mate put it, "He's got the best job in the joint."
Best job turns out to be something called 'Inmate Observation Aide'. Lil Wayne is charged with the responsibility of reporting any prisoners who seem suicidal. For this he gets 50 cents an hour, a far cry from the $42 million he earned last year, but considered highly desirable by fellow prisoners since it is the highest wage available for inmates.
Finally, democrats in Congress have announced that the 'lunatic fringe' (i.e. anyone not a liberal or progressive) has taken control in America. The "wackadoodle quotient" , as Rep. Weiner put it.
Ah yes, all is well with the world. I can now go and enjoy a cup of home brewed coffee and read about how the annointed one is eliminating our nuclear advantage over the rest of the world.
Requiescat in pace. 
No comments:
Post a Comment